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Sex Actualization . Tantra Practice Group
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"A tremendous change is happening on the planet.
I have a feeling we are ready, at long last, to truly love." Dawn Cartwright
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Week 3
We've all experienced the expansive spherical quality of sex at some point in our lives - some of us are pros at surfing the waves of intensity. While outsiders might believe this kind of sexual experience is simply hedonistic and pleasure based - those who surf the waves know better.
Each time sexual intensity peaks, this occurs because two things have happened in perfect balance - first, there is containment - knowing how to literally stack arousal in the body without dispersing. Second, there is humility - allowing the intensity to remake the internal body so that space is created for more arousal, causing the entire body to be filled with sexual charge.
What most don't realize, is the only thing in the way is the mind - thoughts and beliefs and fixed points of view that limit our inner reach. Ask any big wave surfer and they'll tell you the same thing. Ask any humble yogi and they'll confirm - the only limit is the mind.
A sphere is a perfectly round three-dimensional geometric figure, with every point on its surface equidistant to its center.
As we encounter both sensation and thought, stacking our perceptions without selecting any one as "the one", and do so with humility, letting ourselves be remade through this expansive view, we enter the spherical reality where every sensation and thought is the perfect wave. A point equidistant to the center. Bar none.
Any time we choose one point of view, we form a fixed position. A contraction. A fixed position that naturally excludes one or more other positions. It is no longer a sphere.
Orgasm is every view. It is spherical.
At the center of the sphere, there is space. Silent tranquility. This is where all surfers live. This is Tantric orgasm, an orgasm that has no beginning or end. No contraction. At all.
The Center of the Sphere
. . . . . . . .
We'll continue this exploration tonight, November 17th.
When you arrive, please use the restrooms on the ground floor instead of the restroom in the loft. This will save huge amounts of time and create a much more pleasant flow for everyone. To access the downstairs restrooms: The main entrance to the main building (from the parking lot side) is the first door to the left of entrance to the elevator. There is a corridor that leads to the restaurants and directly after the hallway are two public restrooms on the left. No key is required and there are multiple stalls.
Sex Actualization . Tantra Practice Group . Schedule
- Week 1 . October 27th . Open Class . The Spandakarika
- Week 2 . November 3rd . Magnetism, Attraction & Chemistry
- Week 3 . November 10th . Spherical Reality
- Week 4 . November 17th . Intimacy Beyond Orgasm
- No Class November 24th . Thanksgiving
- Week 5 . December 1st . The Multidimensional Clitoris
- No Class December 8th . Fragrance of the Lotus Tantra Teacher Training 2016
- Week 6 . December 15th . The Multidimensional Penis
- Week 7 . December 22nd . Mahamudra
How To Prepare . Please arrive between 7:00 pm and 7:15 pm if possible. Enter the space silently and find your place in the circle. A request, when you arrive, please use the restrooms on the ground floor instead of the restroom in the loft. This will save huge amounts of time and create a much more pleasant flow for everyone. Details here . . .
How To Access the Downstairs Restrooms . The main entrance to the main building (from the parking lot side) is the first door to the left of entrance to the elevator. There is a corridor that leads to the restaurants and directly after the hallway are two public restrooms on the left. No key is required and there are multiple stalls.
What To Bring . Pillow and blanket or sheepskin to sit and lie down on. Plan your day and commute so that you are able to arrive early to allow plenty of time to find parking. What would make it possible for you to arrive and be in the space by 7:00 pm? 7:15 pm latest? Please enter in silence and remain in silence if you arrive after 7:00 pm.
In this newsletter, you'll find details about some Tips For Getting the Most Out of Class Each Week, Something I'd Like To Introduce You To, this week's Home Practice, information on How To Make Up Last Week's Session if you missed it, an invitation to our Endless Love Facebook Group, my iTunes Playlist for the Music played in class, some Q & A from all of you, the Sex Actualization . Video Teleclass information and more.
Much love, Dawn
Chandra Bindu Tantra Institute
www.chandrabindutantrainstitute.com
310.592.1293
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I'd Like to Introduce you to . . . Yab Yum
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Sex Actualization . Tantra Practice Group
Throughout Hindu and Tibetan Buddhist Tantric iconography we see the image of lovers sitting together in ecstatic embrace.
This embrace is known as Yab Yum. Yab is Tibetan for father. Yum is Tibetan for Mother.
According to Wikipedia . . .
"In Tibetan Buddhism, Yab Yum, symbolizes dualism which must be exceeded.
The sacred Tantric practice leads to rapid development of mind by using the experience of bliss, non-duality, and ecstasy while in communion with one's consort."
In the Hindu traditions Yab Yum symbolizes divine creation.
The perfect meeting of containment and humility.
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Sex Actualization . Tantra Practice Group
A practice for silent tranquility. The perfect meeting of containment and humility.
Yab Yum Practice
Invite a friend or lover to join you for this practice. Together, find a place indoors or out in nature where you feel comfortable. A place where you will not be disturbed. Make sure you have plenty of soft blankets and pillows nearby. Wear soft, loose-fitting clothing. Do not wear belts or buttons.
Begin sitting, facing one another, in baddha konasana, with pillows under your knees. Close your eyes and let your hips melt open, knees softening toward the earth. Peel the soles of your feet apart, like the pages of a book. Relax, breathe, let go. Allow 3-5 minutes for this gentle opening.
When both you feel ready, open your eyes. Gaze receptively, allowing your partner to fall into your eyes like sunlight through windows. Open your chest, soften your face. Notice your breathing. Allow your breathing to slowly expand, opening your body and mind.
 After 3-5 minutes, the taller partner will transition to Sukhasana, sitting with legs crossed. The less tall partner will gently climb into the lap, facing the taller partner. Embrace in a warm hug. Allow the bodies to melt together. Make any adjustments necessary to feel comfortable, connected and open.
Notice - your bodies are in perfect alignment. Meeting on every level. Sex, heart and mind, aligned. Trust that you, together, can support this position. Allow your bodies to let go.
After 3-5 minutes move apart. Sit facing one another again. Give yourselves time to absorb the experience. Then, when you both feel ready, the less tall partner will take the taller partner onto their lap. When we sit, pelvis to pelvis this way, we can actually support more weight than expected. The hips open, an internal and external stability appears.
This time, once you have settled in, begin to sychronize your breathing. Breath in together, then exhale together. Don't worry about the rhythms matching perfectly, as long as the flow is harmonious. Breathe in from the earth, breathe out from the heart. Together you are creating two circles, two-dimensional spheres that, over time, will expand to become 3-dimentional, the energy of your practice enveloping you both in silent tranquility.
After 3-5 minutes, slide gently apart. Lie down next to one another in silence. Melt into the feelings inside.
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Make Up Last Week's Class . Private Sessions
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Private Sessions
If you missed class last week, or if you were there and you'd like to take it deeper, you can do that by scheduling a private session with me. I'm available weekdays 10:00 am to 4:00 pm. Skype sessions may also be possible.
Private Sessions
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Facebook . Endless Love Facebook Group
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Facebook
I've set up an Endless Love group for us on Facebook. It is a closed group, please invite your friends. It's a place where you can share your experiences, ask questions, and get updates on this class. It's becoming a very dynamic group. You can join the group by following the link below.
Endless Love Facebook Group
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Music
Dawn's Spotify playlist for the music played in class. List updated weekly. Please click on image below to access full playlist on Spotify . . .
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Feedback and Q&A
Please send me your questions - what's happening in your life? Thanks to those of you who checked in with me after the class - and - those of you out there in our world-wide community who chimed in.
If you don't see your question here, fear not. All questions submitted will be answered over the coming weeks.
Dear Dawn,
How do I stop myself from falling in love so easily? I love to love and the loving doesn't come with attachment or any kind of jealousy but it does mean I fall right in. I love deeply. And I think that comes across as scary to those I fall for. I have also seen it in my children. How do I let myself be me but find that line of distance? Just writing that makes me cringe.
Cheers, Ronán
Belfast . Ireland
Dear Ronan,
Let's explore the spherical view.
Most of us, because we are accustomed to the "start and stop" view of relationship, rarely allow ourselves to feel truly relaxed, truly present, truly open to the experience. We are looking for the ending, or trying to avoid the ending, or trying to create the perfect ending. We are ending before we've begun.
When we aren't bracing for the ending, we find ourselves reading self-help books, getting advice from our friends, doing everything in our power - to make sure the relationship - never ends. We are caught in "either, or", yet love is both closeness and distance. Beginnings and endings. Love is "and." This is the spherical view.
"Let us enter the great spherical movement; let us forget the rectilinear pathway that assumes there is a progression and the attainment of a goal. Let us be like a wave that accepts its pathway, its strength, its weakness, its freedom, the absence of choice."
Daniel Odier . Spandakarika
Love (and everything else) is a wave that appears, disappears and reappears. When we begin to notice we are clinging to "start and stop" and "either, or", when make noticing our practice, we discover the vibrant, dynamic, tranquility that is always here beyond our clinging. We experience love as a wave - not an outcome, reflection or result.
As you've found in your loving, this isn't necessarily easy. We have learned to be comfortable in the "either, or" and the "start and stop" fixed points of view, these give us context for who we believe we are - something that begins and ends. We create strategies for 'finding a line of distance" to avoid the vastness that this (life happening moment by moment) truly is. We become obsessed with "having" the love object to create the illusion that time has stopped and we can rest - in static complacency. Yet nothing is static. Everything is changing, appearing, disappearing, reappearing.
Even as I write these words, perhaps you can feel, as I do, this constant motion itself creates a dynamic sphere - filled with stillness. Every point, every emotion, every fear, every ecstasy, every lover, exists on that sphere. And the stillness in the center, this is orgasm, though most have never experienced true orgasm - a place that exists just beyond the habitual muscular contractions we are accustomed to. Few have surfed the waves of ecstatic tranquility, much less dissolved into the waves themselves.
Encounter all these things with equanimity. Fall in love deeply. Feel jealously and non-jealousy. Attachment and non-attachment. Move closer inside yourself to feelings that arise in the (apparent) face of fear in those you love. Meet all of them without choosing one. They are the substance of the sphere - and the sphere itself defines the center. Makes it known.
Much love, Dawn
. . . . . . . .
Dear Dawn,
I think I'm experiencing vaginal atrophy. I'm 3 years post-menopause and sex is very painful. What's the deal to heal?
Love you, Emma
Pacific Palisades . California
Dear Emma,
Shifting hormones as well as past experiences including childbirth, medical procedures, yeast infections, sexually transmitted diseases and sexual experience of all kinds, can affect the lining and connective tissues of the vagina, vulva and clitoris. First, visit your doctor and ask for a full panel of tests to get a clear picture of your overall sexual and vaginal health. Once you've completed those tests and address any immediate issues here are some practices you can explore:
1. Reduce the stress in your life. Your pelvic organs are the first to experience stress. What can you do to gentle-down your life right now? A cup of herbal tea? Turn off screens by 8:00 pm each night? A walk in nature? One less appointment per week?
2. Stay hydrated. Drink water and avoid sugar. You might even consider taking Hyaluronic Acid, a supplement that hydrates the connective tissue in the body. Your vaginal opening is a place where the dehydration of connective tissue can be felt as a burning, tugging sensation during painful sex.
3. Get plenty of rest. How about 8 hours - plus - a nap at lunchtime? This is your sex life we're talking about. Sleep is no longer a luxury - and it's one of the best beauty treatments you'll ever give yourself.
4. Practice your pelvic floor exercises. Did you know there's more to Kegels than squeeze and release? Educate yourself and get a vaginal wakeup routine in place.
5. Self-pleasure at least once per week. Explore your body without "going for a goal". Focus on pleasure and openness - feel more of what is there rather than look for what is missing.
6. Twenty-one minutes of foreplay. Whenever you plan to make love with penetration, give yourself time for at least 21 minutes of foreplay. A recent study showed that 9 out of 10 women who regularly experienced 21 minutes or more of oral sex - orgasmed consistently.
7. Truth is sexy. Communicate what you desire, what you need and how you feel - open up to yourself and your partner.
I've spent the last 6 years creating a comprehensive vaginal rejuvenation program for women that has been tremendously successful with my students, clients and friends. These practices are so beneficial, I use them myself. Please join me for Tantric Aging Secrets for Women a 5-night sexual rejuvenation retreat in Ojai, California, for women 20 years and bolder, autumn 2017. Please send me more information about the retreat!
Much love, Dawn
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Tips for getting the most out of class each week . . .
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Sex Actualization . Tantra Practice Group
Some tips for getting the most out of the Sex Actualization . Tantra Practice Group . . .
- Give yourself 15 minutes extra for your commute. If it takes you 30 minutes to get to Marina del Rey, leave your office by 6:15 pm to arrive and find parking by 7:00 pm.
- When you do arrive and find parking, take 2 minutes, sit in your car and make a transition. Let go of the work day and traffic. Turn off your cell phone - don't just mute it - turn it off. Begin to bring your focus to you, your sexuality and your sexual journey. Start class inside yourself before you even get out of the car.
- Pause again at the door. Take off your shoes and leave them outside next to the door or place them in your backpack or purse and bring them inside.
- Enter the space consciously. In silence.
- Please do not wear synthetic perfumes or colognes, many people are allergic.
- If you're able to arrive early, we'd be thrilled to get some help moving furniture, lighting candles, showering the space with rose petals and basically creating heaven on earth, 6:45-7:00 pm.
- Enter the space silently and take your space in the circle. Give yourself time to land.
- Notice if you're always sitting in the same place each week, or if you've decided you need back support and always sit near the wall - be open to something new.
- Listen to the music during the silent meditation with your whole body.
- Modify the practices in any way that makes it possible for you to participate more fully. If you have a boundary or injury that needs extra care, please take time to create the best situation possible for yourself and your partners.
- Unless you're already involved with someone in the class, I suggest you consider not dating anyone in class - until the series is over. This applies to getting together for practice sessions between the classes too - wait until the series is over, practice on your own for now. The virtues of this one tip alone are infinite.
- Ask questions. (I love questions.)
- Make requests. (I love requests.)
- Send music suggestions. (I love music suggestions.)
- Treat yourself and every member of the group as someone precious - I can promise you, each one of you is.
- At the end of class, take a moment to fully savor all you have experienced and received.
- If you're up for helping out with getting all the furniture back in place, we'd love your assistance.
- Be sure to collect all your belongings and be out the door no later than 9:50 pm.
- No woman leaves on her own. Please, couples and men, offer your arm to the single women in the class. Walk her to her car, offer to carry her things if you feel to. See her off safely into the night.
- Allow 5-10 minutes each day for your home practice.
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Sex Actualization . Video Home Study Course
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Six 1-Hour Sessions . HD Video . Available for Streaming
Thank you to all of you around the world who encouraged me to create a video teleclass highlighting the Sex Actualization . Tantra Practice Group sessions. In these 1-hour sessions you are guided you through the same Tantric practices, exercises and meditations experienced in the live Sex Actualization classes. All the information, lectures, opening and closing practices are included. It's as if you are here, participating live - and - by purchasing the series for download, you'll have the videos to refer back to and practice over and over, taking the techniques deeper each time.
Sex Actualization . Video Home Study Course
Six 1-Hour Videos . Streaming
$350 series of 6 classes
Purchase & View Now
Sex Actualization . Video Home Study Course
Session 1 . Sex & Kundalini Energy
Session 2 . Partner Practice & New Beginnings
Session 3 . What is Love?
Session 4 . Sexual Confidence & Generosity
Session 5 . Mutual Orgasm
Session 6 . Sex & Self-Discovery
Chandra Bindu Tantra Institute
www.chandrabindutantrainstitute.com
310.592.1293
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